Apparently when you are in a job interview and the interviewer asks you to choose one word that best describes yourself, the correct answer is not “Fergalicious.”
It took me 18 years to realise Saturday has turd in it
It took me 18 years and somebody else’s text post to realise Saturday has turd in it
let’s play a game called “I’m totally joking, but would do that in a heartbeat if you were into it”
Unsure of how to confess your love to someone? Try this:
- Acquire several dozen limes.
- Go up to them and then drop all the limes.
- Start picking them up, but keep dropping them. The clumsier you look the better.
- Keep doing this until you have their attention (this could take up to thirty minutes).
- Finally gather up the limes. Try looking a bit sheepish.
- Look them deeply in the eyes and say, “Sorry. I’m bad at Pickup Limes.”
- Marry them.